For shirts.

For shirts.

And I refuse to dry my body off.

And I refuse to dry my body off.

Okay, but only because you asked so eloquently.

Okay, but only because you asked so eloquently.

Just figuratively, though. 

Just figuratively, though. 

I’m very comfortable around short pencils.

I’m very comfortable around short pencils.

Come on, is that your best bass face?

Come on, is that your best bass face?

NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO!

NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO!

I’m listening straight at you right now.

I’m listening straight at you right now.

Anybody wanna bungle in my jungle? No? Okay.

Anybody wanna bungle in my jungle? No? Okay.

And I am NOT a Republican.

And I am NOT a Republican.

At least something is long down there.

At least something is long down there.

Turd.

Turd.

"The past is not dead. It is not even past."  - William Faulkner
Like so many others, all week long our thoughts have been with the family and friends of Michael Brown and the entire community of Ferguson. We are proud St. Louisans who attended community college just blocks from where this horrific tragedy happened, and our hearts are heavy with compassion for those involved and solemn solidarity with all who are are tired of watching this kind of brutal bullshit take place in this city, this state, and this country.
As we saw last night with the security takeover by Ron Johnson, so much progress can be made by simply putting the assault weapons down and engaging one another. Police snipers pointing rifles at grieving, innocent citizens from atop a military truck is not going to help heal a community devastated by the execution of an unarmed teenager.
The first step towards healing is recognizing a sickness for what it truly is. We (Baseball Card Vandals) are two white males. We’ll never be able to fully understand the awful burden that young black men in places like Ferguson have had placed on their shoulders by the violent, racist history of the United States. It is so terrible, so unjust and so deeply saddening. But we recognize it. It is real. We must acknowledge this. And as Americans, we must do everything in our power, every day, to cultivate true equality and rid ourselves of the disgusting legacy of this country’s original sin. 
We’re with you Ferguson. WE LOVE YOU, EVERYBODY.

"The past is not dead. It is not even past."  - William Faulkner

Like so many others, all week long our thoughts have been with the family and friends of Michael Brown and the entire community of Ferguson. We are proud St. Louisans who attended community college just blocks from where this horrific tragedy happened, and our hearts are heavy with compassion for those involved and solemn solidarity with all who are are tired of watching this kind of brutal bullshit take place in this city, this state, and this country.

As we saw last night with the security takeover by Ron Johnson, so much progress can be made by simply putting the assault weapons down and engaging one another. Police snipers pointing rifles at grieving, innocent citizens from atop a military truck is not going to help heal a community devastated by the execution of an unarmed teenager.

The first step towards healing is recognizing a sickness for what it truly is. We (Baseball Card Vandals) are two white males. We’ll never be able to fully understand the awful burden that young black men in places like Ferguson have had placed on their shoulders by the violent, racist history of the United States. It is so terrible, so unjust and so deeply saddening. But we recognize it. It is real. We must acknowledge this. And as Americans, we must do everything in our power, every day, to cultivate true equality and rid ourselves of the disgusting legacy of this country’s original sin. 

We’re with you Ferguson. WE LOVE YOU, EVERYBODY.

Shout at the devil.

Shout at the devil.

Just unfold that turtleneck and cover your smile for us. Please.

Just unfold that turtleneck and cover your smile for us. Please.